Accessing Your Badass
So maybe you’ve taken stock of where your Good/Perfect woman is showing up in your life.
Now let’s talk stock of where your Badass WANTS to be showing up in your life.
Your badass exists in you.
She's been there since birth,
before you were taught not to trust her-
that her needs were too much.
Your badass is a piece of you.
The piece of you who defies the scripts you've been told
Who knows what she needs
and feels no shame in asking for it.
Your badass wants you to live out your deepest desires
To say yes to yourself
and no to that which does not serve you.
Your badass does not care if she is 'too much'
takes up too much space
laughs too loud
wants too much.
Your badass wants to live out her purpose
To live a life of pleasure
To experience immense joy
and satisfaction in moments.
Call her what you want.
Some call her
Whatever you call her-
know that she exists
and she is waiting for you to
listen to her.
Start getting to know your Badass
Get curious about what she wants. What she needs. What she hungers for. What makes her feel alive.
Here are some questions I ask my clients (that you can ask yourself):
What would you do if you didn’t worry about what other people thought?
What would you do if you were ‘selfish’?
What pleasure would you want to experience if you felt no shame?
I do many things with my clients to help them access their Badass, including some practices to help her tune into and start trusting her body and her ‘knowing’. Exercises to help her start being in her body more. I won’t get into them here but feel free to book free a 1:1 consult with me to learn more.
I also suggest a bunch of different activities to help her connect with her inner Badass, like writing out a list of her Badass idols and what makes them so badass, or doing a Badass photoshoot.
Once we get some clarity on what she DOES want, we can start practicing new beliefs to get her there. Some of which might include:
I deserve pleasure
Pleasure is my birthright
I’m allowed to have needs
My needs are just as important as anyone else’s
Self care is not selfish
I am flawed AND loveable
Perfect doesn’t exist
I’m allowed to take up space
Just to name a few. It’s important to note that you must believe them, or else they are ineffective. If you don’t, you need to start more neutral (see my Thought Tiers resource).
And then comes the real work. You practice these over and over. When you’re driving. When you’re brushing your teeth. When you’re cooking. When you catch your Good Woman thinking taking over. Then, eventually, in time, your Badass takes over the driver’s seat.
She starts making the decisions. It’s her voice you hear in your head. You start asking for what you need. It gets easier to set boundaries. You start saying “yes” when you want to say “yes” and “no” when you want to say “no”. Your relationship with pleasure changes. You start connecting with yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, that you never did before.
But remember, it’s a process and it takes time. And lots of patience. While your Badass has always been there, your Good woman has been groomed since you came into this world. It will take some time to silence her.
Your Badass is the woman you have always been. The little girl with big dreams and a big personality, who knew what she wanted and went for it, before she learned she was wrong. Her existence was wrong. Her wants were wrong. Reacquainting yourself with your Badass is reconnecting to that little girl. To the woman you were always designed to be before the world got in the way. Powerful. Limitless. Knowing. Intuitive. Magical. Creative. Loving. Fierce.
She has always been there.
Waiting for you to come find her.
Now go give her the goddamn keys.